You know we got Kang, we got Koloth and Kor
Three bad-ass Klingons and they're headed to war
Kor's starting a ruckus and spends the night in jail
Koloth shows up in the office to pay his buddy's bail
Pops out of thin air and his appearance is brutal
Got a stache like Fu Manchu(1) and a haircut like a poodle
Looks with derision on the drunk in the prison
Won't even listen when Jadzia wants to got with 'em
That's right, we got Kor, we got Koloth, and Kang
Don't want this sexy new Dax to join in their gang
On their quest for vengenace to kill the albino,
She's in better shape than all of them, but what the hell do I know?
But they see her swing a bat'leth and it starts to give them pause
They think the new host could still bring honor to their cause
To fight a child-killer who used a virus and genetics
Instead of fight them man to man, he's really that pathetic
So now it's Kang and Kor and Koloth and Dax
In orbit of the planet when Kang spills the facts
It wasn't a plan for battle, it was a plan for suicide.
Klingons are the ones in the Kobayashi Maru(2) this time.
Koloth tells him this trap is what you get when you deal with the devil
Should never have believed this guy would play on the level
They can trust him to fight fair 'cause he's always been a coward
But now they're bustin' in his lair and his guns have been de-powered
Kick down his door, "Look upon your executioners!"
They're about to rip your heart out and send you straight to Lucifer
Or the gates of Gre'thor and the face of Fek'lhr(3)
Not Three Musketeers, but three masters of Dahar.
- A style of mustache extending below the lips and on either side of the chin.
- Starfleet Academy simulation exercise involving a rescue on the Klingon-Federation border, famous for being impossible to win.
- Klingon equivalent of Hell, and the monster who guards its entrance, respectively.
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