Tuesday, December 24, 2013

In the Pale Moonlight

Dad's gotta convince the Romulans to enter in the war
Committed to a plan, like he was stepping through that door
When the news comes in they lost the battle for Betazed
Abandon the planet like Sarpeidons and A-to-zed(1)
But other times he finds he's unsure of that position
Make a bribe to Quark, his faith in Rules of Acquisition
Is restored, dad's doubts get ignored
'Cause now there's a senator coming on board
Rod's fraudulent, but show the Romulans
And maintain that it's perfectly cromulent(2)
Like trying to bluff Balok back aboard the Fesarius(3)
But Captain Kirk's associates were never this nefarious
With the truth exposed, so Romulus goes from neutral to opponent
A fair approximation(4), but it only convinced him for a moment
Until it's clear that Garak just wanted him on the station
To plant a bomb on his shuttle, looks like Dominion assassination
Is it abandoning what he stands for, or protecting the Greater Good?(5)
Just like Sandford NWA hiding Under the Hood(6)
One senator, one crook, and unless he's off the mark
Starfleet's struck a bargain would be the envy of Quark
  1. Mr. Atoz was a librarian who oversaw the atavachron, used by inhabitants of the planet Sarpeidon to escape an imminent supernova in the episode "All Our Yesterdays".
  2. Neologism from The Simpsons episode "Lisa the Iconoclast",  meaning valid or acceptable.
  3. From TOS's "The Corbomite Maneuver",  where Captain Kirk successfully bluffs the captain of the Fesarius.
  4. Senator Vreenak's description of the replicated Kali-fal, which could also be applied to the holographic simulation.
  5. From Hot Fuzz, where the Sandford Neighborhood Watch Association, in hooded cloaks, kills undesirable elements claiming it was for "the greater good".
  6. Autobiography of the superhero Nite Owl / Hollis Mason in Watchmen, who was portrayed by Stephen McHattie (Senator Vreenak) in the film version.

Monday, December 16, 2013


Originally Appeared Here

I'm back with some rhymes, Bashir is seeking warmer climes
Gonna get away to a conference on Casperia Prime
He's stopped in that ambition, an unexpected inquisition(1)
Sloan badgers the crew, tries to force a guilty admission
Says the Dominion had turned him, back during internment
When dad intervenes, Sloan says It's not you concern, man
Super deep cover, Iliana Ghemor,(2)
Sloan wants the doctor kept in jail through the war
Snatched from his cell by Weyoun, says they've been through this before.
But the charade starts to show,
O'Brien's shoulder healed like John Doe(3)
Convinces Section 31 to shut down their holographic tableau
Bashir sees they're unscrupulous,
can't believe Starfleet would stoop to this
Up against Obsidian Order, they may have their usefulness.
It's not all sexy babes and sippin' Saurian brandy(4),
But all that time playing spy might still come in handy.

  1. From the famous Monty Python skit, where "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!"
  2. From DS9's "Second Skin", in which Major Kira is told her memories were implanted as part of her cover, and that she was a spy (named Iliana Ghemor) without knowing it, much as Bashir is told by Sloan in this episode.
  3. In the TNG episode "Transfigurations", the Zalkonian known as John Doe heals Chief O'Brien's dislocated shoulder with a touch.
  4. Alcoholic beverage appearing throughout Star Trek.